The Edmonton Geek Society

100 Things I Love About Comics

2006-02-17T17:18:00.000-07:00

When I first stumbled across the wide world of comic bloggers about five months ago, one of the first ones I read was Mike Sterling’s Progressive Ruin. I was skimming through the archives when I came across an article he wrote in February 2005, entitled 100 Things I Love About Comics! This was based on a couple of comics by Fred Hembeck, and it quickly grew into a meme of surprising proportions. I was only sad that I was unable to put up my own list without looking faintly ridiculous (Hey, look at me doing a meme that died off a half a year ago!). I suppose you could say that I could have just written my list of 100 for myself, but that's much too silly to reply to. So, so silly.

To my delight, Mike put up another list of 100 things he loved on the 14th, and I saw my opening. So I took some time over the past two days to think of a hundred things I love about comics. At 27, periods of lagging interest and low income have limited what I've been able to buy, beg, borrow, or otherwise consume in terms of comics, but this is what generally makes me happy about comics. A character, a series, a writer, an artist, a situation, a line of dialogue, a webcomic, whatever: 100 examples of why I love comics. Just in time to be late for Valentimes Day.

1. The Absorbascon

2. Neal Adams

3. The Adventures of Barry Ween: Boy Genius. (The last 5 pages of the last series made me cry like a baby.)

4. The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay.

5. "And a lean, silent figure slowly fades into the gathering darkness, aware at last that in this world, with great power there must also come -- great responsibility! "

6. Animal Man #5 - "The Coyote Gospel"

7. Asterix & Obelix

8. Astro City Vol. 2 #14-20 - "The Tarnished Angel"

9. Atlantis Attacks! (It's not actually very good, but it's the first comics crossover I remember reading, and it never fails to put a smile on my face.)

10. The Authority #1-12

11. Barbara Gordon. (Whether she's Batgirl or Oracle, my biggest comics crush - because she's a big geek at heart like me. Plus, red hair.)

12. Batman: The Killing Joke

13. Beaucoup Kevin

14. Beta Ray Bill

15. Betty & Veronica's trip to West Edmonton Mall. I swear to god, there was a comic where they go to W.E.M., and if I can ever find it, I will buy it for sheer kitch value.

16. Berkeley Breathed

17. Blue Beetle & Booster Gold. (The dynamic duo of my childhood.)

18. Bob The Angry Flower

19. Bone by Jeff Smith

20. The Books of Magic

21. Mark Buckingham on Batman: Shadow of the Bat

22. Calvin & Hobbes

23. Captain America & The Falcon (both series)

24. Captain America: Red, White & Blue

25. The comics spinner we got at work. Part of the continuing reintroduction of comics into the mainstream.

26. A Contract With God

27. Daredevil: The Man Without Fear

28. The Dark Knight Returns

29. DC - The New Frontier

30. DC's old-school bullet logo.

31. Deadman: Love After Death

32. Diesel Sweeties

33. "Don't mess with me lady. I've been drinking with skeletons."

34. Warren Ellis

35. Garth Ennis

36. Fables

37. Green Arrow: The Longbow Hunters

38. Green Lantern / Green Arrow. (Look, I know it's cheesy, you know it's cheesy. But I absolutely LOVE it.)

39. The Green Lantern Corps

40. Hellboy

41. HeroClix. (The game that lets me team up Mr. Terrific and Mr. Fantastic! For anyone who wanted to write superhero comics but just weren't good enough.)

42. Hitman

43. "I have an orgasm every five minutes. Please do not tell my father."

44. "I'm a nasty piece of work, chief. Ask anybody."

45. Jack Hawksmoor

46. JLA #36-41 – "World War Three"

47. JLA #42-46 – "Tower of Babel"

48. John Constantine: Hellblazer

49. Jughead's Double Digest. (When I was very young, I loved Jughead. A guy who loved hamburgers and hated women? My role model.)

50. Justice League of America #100-102 - "The Unknown Soldier of Victory"

51. Kilowog

52. Kingdom Come

53. Jack Kirby

54. Todd Klein. (The fact that I even have a favourite letterer is testimony to my true geekitude.)

55. The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. (NOT the movie.)

56. Stan Lee

57. Lone Wolf & Cub

58. Madman

59. Martian Manhunter. (I love the character, but I particularly like the 90s series by Ostrander & Mandrake.)

60. Laura Martin

61. The Metal Men

62. Milk & Cheese

63. Grant Morrison

64. Alan Moore

65. Mr. Fixit

66. New X-Men by Morrison

67. Owly

68. Peanuts

69. Peter Porker, The Spectacular Spider-Ham

70. Puck

71. Planetary

72. Plastic Man by Kyle Baker

73. Preacher

74. Mike Sterling's Progressive Ruin

75. Queen & Country

76. Questionable Content

77. Humberto Ramos drawing Spider-Man

78. Jeffrey Rowland

79. Runaways

80. Sam & Fuzzy

81. Sandman

82. Scary Go Round

83. The Sentry by Paul Jenkins & Jae Lee

84. Seven Soldiers by Morrison et al.

85. "Show me your thumbs!"

86. Spider-Man's Tangled Web #5 & 6 - "Flowers For Rhino"

87. Steel

88. Swamp Thing

89. Too Much Coffee Man

90. Transmetropolitan. (The comic that got me back into comics after a long absence.)

91. Twisted Toyfare Theatre

92. Understanding Comics

93. V for Vendetta

94. Warlock by Jim Starlin

95. Watchmen

96. "We had a team-up. You were great."

97. Wednesdays! Circling around the comic stands, looking for a title that jumps out at me that I've never seen before, the thrill of the hunt...

98. West Coast Avengers. (The only superhero team I remember loving from when I was a kid.)

99. X-Force / X-Statix

100. Y: The Last Man

Comics: Playing Catch-Up, Volume Two

2006-02-17T13:52:00.000-07:00

I may have been down, folks, but I am certainly not out. Not even a broken computer can keep me away from writing pointlessly about comics!

December 21, 2005

Birds of Prey #89 - "Perfect Pitch, Part Three"
(Gail Simone, words; Paulo Siqueira, pencils)

Compared to last months' mediocre offering, this issue has much more cohesion and thrust; all the plot threads tighten and the story really picks up. Simone handles both emotion and action with ease, and that's one of the great things about Birds of Prey: strong women with well-defined characters, comfortable whether their sharing their feelings, kicking ass, or hanging out. The book's been criticized for furthering female supehero clichés (e.g. unrealistically sexy women in spandex and fishnets, being defined by their sexuality, behaving too 'girly'), but I think that this title effectively uses those aspects of superheroines - and women in general - when the characters demand it. New penciller Siqueira draws a good knock-down fight scene, and his facial expressions add a lot to the story without Simone having to spell things out. A marked improvement over last month, and the two special guests that show up at the end have me eagerly anticipating issue #90.
Expectation: 3.0
Rating: 3.5
Differential: +0.5

DMZ #2 - "On The Ground, Part Two" (Late from previous week.)
(Brian Wood, words; Riccardo Burchielli & Brian Wood, art)

There aren't many comics that have a journalist as the main character (I can only think of one off the top of my head), but it seems like a really smart idea: if you're going to be exploring a strange new place, a journalist would be a good guide. DMZ's journalist (Matty Roth) is thrust into the new Manhattan with little information and he has to explore it for himself, which puts him on the same level as the reader. This issue introduces a few new and interesting characters (I hope to see more of the ex-Marine sniper) and is convincing when showing how people live and die in the Demilitarized Zone. I'm not buying the notion of Manhattan as the middle point between warring groups of states as particularly believable, but I am enjoying the series enough to suspend my disbelief for a while. A good comic that tells an old story in a new way.
Expectation: 3.0
Rating: 3.5
Differential: +0.5

Green Lantern Corps: Recharge #3
(Dave Gibbons & Geoff Johns, words; Patrick Gleason, pencils)

I'm not going to lie to anyone here: I picked up the new GL Corps book because I loves me some Kilowog, and when Patrick Gleason gives me a splash page like he does on Page Five, I'm a happy camper. This book keeps throwing adventure and excitement at us: Kilowog helps two bickering Lanterns work as a team while Kyle and Guy rescue reluctant new recruit Sorak Natu from the Spider Guild. While the "strong men rescue a pretty girl in distress" plot irks me a little, I get past it because Gibbons is telling an interesting story in the bigger picture (much better than I was lead to expect from The Rann-Thanagarian War). Gleason and inkers Prentis Rollins & Christian Alamy put in some great work here, handling both intimidating space vistas and intimate personal touches (I love Guy's face on Page Three). I'm a little confused by all the people that appear in this title; I don't know any of the bounty hunters that pop up this issue, and I don't know if the Spider Guild is a brand new threat or something that's been thought up for this issue - but that really doesn't matter, because GLC: Recharge is good space opera and a good team book.
Expectation: 3.0
Rating: 4.0
Differential: +1.0

Hellblazer #215 – "R.S.V.P., Part Two"
(Mike Carey, words; Leonardo Manco, art)

England's premiere magic association the Tate Club is having its bicentennial and the organizers have wrangled Constantine into making the keynote speech, despite the traumas of his recent past (amnesia, hunting his demon children, a death in the family, busting up with his mate, and so on - really, par for the course for John). You just know he's got some surprise cooked up for the crew, but just what it is was actually surprising. John's speech is remarkable for its vitriole and appropriateness, and the ending flourish was classic Constantine. This is Carey's farewell issue, and like Azarello he ends his run with an unexpected twist that is likely going to be undone by the new writer, mystery writer Denise Mina. This issue, like most of Carey's run, got back to what I see as the roots of the character without adding anything to the mystique, and although it was good I would like to see this title be great again.
Expectation: 3.0
Rating: 3.5
Differential: +0.5

Infinite Crisis #3
(Geoff Johns, words; Phil Jiminez, art)

The first time I read this issue, I was nearly stunned at what happened; so many things in so many pages, it boggled my mind. Upon a re-read, however, the story simplified itself a lot. It's not as complicated as I once thought: a lot of "big things" happen, but most of them are part of one larger theme (destruction & reconstruction). There's a nice character moment in Batman and Earth-II Superman's meeting, and a whole lot of mysteries are finally revealed. It's not a bad issue, it's just not as great as I was hoping. The fact that this issue didn't seem as stunning on re-reading puts me in a gloomy mood when I think that it may just be the same for the series as a whole.
Expectation: 4.0
Rating: 3.0
Differential: -1.0

Seven Soldiers: The Bulleteer #2
(Grant Morrison, words; Yanick Paquette, pencils)

Issue Two of this miniseries is a little better than the first, but it's still (to me) the weakest of the entire 7Soldiers experiment. The Bulleteer is where Morrison starts really tying the series together and connects them with the Seven Soldiers #0 one-shot, so it's doubly disappointing that I'm not right behind it. Alix is still drawn Super-Cheesecake, but it's less out-of-place and more story-driven when she's put beside Agent Helen Helligan: part of The Bulleteer's power (and her curse) is that her husband saw her only as a sexual object, the same way many comics readers view their superheroines. This issue seemed disorganized and out of sync as well, which was the most frustrating thing of all. It may not be fair to compare it to six other series, but The Bulleteer is the weakest for both art and writing, although its growing importance to the overall storyline is more than I'd initially expected.
Expectation: 2.5
Rating: 2.5
Differential: +0

Testament #1
(Douglas Rushkoff, words; Liam Sharp, art)

The Bible isn't just a religious document, but rather, a collection of archetypal stories collected by a number of authors (in an "open source" collaboration) that keeps repeating over and over again through time, even in a military-industrial future America. This is the kind of book that appeals to me right from the beginning: lots of potential, with mature ideas of both kinds ("mature" as in "thoughful and self-reflective" and "Mature" as in "sex, drugs, and violence"). This first issue is pretty dense in both story and art, and if this is any indication of the overall quality of the book, then I'm in for a real treat. The art is a good fit for this book, I think: Liam Sharp does Biblical past and dystopian future equally well, but his conception of the mysterious Dinah seems hyper-sexualized (then again, that might be the point; see The Bulleteer). Testament has a lot of potential, and the creators seem to have the talent to back it up.
Expectation: 3.5
Rating: 4.0
Differential: +0.5

December 28, 2005

JLA Classified #15 - "New Maps of Hell, Part Six"
(Warren Ellis, words; Butch Guice, art)

This story just ran out of steam about halfway through last issue, and it never really recovers. I understand and appreciate making Z, the Martian god of Fear, nothing more than an old artificial intelligence that can't possibly begin to compete with the JLA, but it takes all the air out of the final conflict; it needed some tension and had none. This series slowly became Ellis re-hashing a lot of his superhero ideas that he did better in Stormwatch & The Authority: working together as a team, each member contributing their own skills, and each member is incredibly smart (almost too smart). The last three issues of this series could have been combined to make two and then the story beats would have seemed less drawn out, and the ending would have had more of an impact. At the beginning, I finished every issue excited for the next one; now I'm just glad it's over.
Expectation: 2.5
Rating: 1.5
Differential: -0.5

Revelations #5
(Paul Jenkins, words; Humberto Ramos, pencils)

The cover of this issue spells out what's going to happen inside, which spoiled a major plot point for me - not a great idea in a murder mystery. Still, Jenkins and Ramos are leading up to a hell of a closer if this issue is any indication. The mystery surrounding Detective Northern becomes even more labyrinthine, leading both him and the reader to doubt all the suspects' motives, while his character becomes even more clear. With supporting cast dropping left and right, we're moving into endgame, and I can't wait to read issue six, where (I hope) everything's made clear.
Expectation: 3.5
Rating: 4.0
Differential: +0.5

Comics: Playing Catch-Up, Volume One

2006-01-23T22:55:00.000-07:00

A combination of 25% schoolwork, 25% holidaying, and 50% laziness has led me to stop reviewing my comics for...good lord, two months? That can't possibly be right! No, I guess it is. Very well then; as I think that this is an important exercise in writing, deadlines, and critical-thinking skills, I will go back through eight weeks of comic releases and put five sentences down for every single one of them. This doesn't include this Wednesday's newest batch, though...oh, help me Jebus....

November 30, 2005

Fell #3
(Warren Ellis, words; Ben Templesmith, art)

Fell was just voted the #1 series in the Comics Blogger Poll, and although I think a lot of it has to do with the price, the comic itself is very impressive. This issue's probably the weakest of the three that've been released so far, although that doesn't mean it's bad. Ellis & Templesmith take Detective Richard Fell to a different part of Snowtown and introduce us to more interesting and damaged characters, plus: more Evil Nun Nixon. The conflict's supposed to be high-tension and low-key, and the nine-panel format really helps set the tone, but the energy slowly bleeds out because the scene drags on a little too long. Another interesting story about how the city ruins its inhabitants, and gives us a little more information about the central character.
Expectation: 4.0
Rating: 3.5
Differential: -0.5

JLA: Classified #14 - "New Maps of Hell, Part Five"
(Warren Ellis, words; Butch Guice, art)

In this out-of-continuity JLA story, our heroes confront the Martian god of Fear, who spends this issue torturing them in their own individual Hells. Unlike Fell, Ellis's other offering this week, JLA: Classified is filled with widescreen panels that give us a more cinematic feel (the polarizing decompression) that is appropriate for this larger-than-life story. The "hells" that are custom-made for each character range from cliche to startling to surprising, and some of our heroes deal with them better than others. Batman is suitably...Batman, and my man J'onn J'onnz has a great F*@% YEAH! moment in this issue, but those are the only real story highlights in this issue; plus, the way Guice draws Superman really irritates me. After a really great first two issues, this story's hit a stumbling block.
Expectation: 3.5
Rating: 2.5
Differential: -1.0

Revelations #4
(Paul Jenkins, words; Humberto Ramos, pencils)

This issue marks the beginning of the end of this 6-issue miniseries, and I'm still terribly confused. Everyone's favourite lapsed Catholic English detective is still trying to solve the murder at Vatican, and he's knee-deep in Catholic bureaucracy as well as a few story clichés. Jenkins is telling a really interesting story here, with a number of twists popping up in this issue alone, but the romantic development was telegraphed and out of story necessity rather than story telling. Ramos continues to impress: his cartoony style isn't an obvious fit for the dark murder mystery, but that makes it especially off-putting when things get really gruesome. I think I'm going to like the story when it's all said and done, but right now I'm in a bit of a quagmire - which is what Jenkins & Ramos want, I think.
Expectation: 4.0
Rating: 3.5
Differential: -0.5

December 7, 2005

Jonah Hex #2
(Jimmy Palmiotti & Justin Gray, words; Luke Ross, art)

Jonah Hex is an old western serial; every month you pick it up, you get a brand new story with the continued adventures of everyone's hideously disfigured bounty hunter. And if the creative team keeps up the level of quality that the past two issues have had, I'm going to be one happy cowboy. Palmiotti and Gray set up a good story of greed and revenge, complete with a sexy lady sidekick, a two-faced lawman, and a dynamite caper. Usually I focus on a book's writer (or writers), but this title just wouldn't be as good withouth Luke Ross's art; he tailors his panel layout to fit the mood of every scene, and his art is wide in scope with good attention to detail. DC could have a runaway hit on its hands with this one; it's much better than some of the in-continuity titles it's putting out.
Expectation: 4.0
Rating: 4.0
Differential: 0

Powers #15
(Brian Michael Bendis, words; Michael Avon Oeming, art)

Powers is a frustrating book for me; it's usually pretty good, but a few weeks after an issue comes out I get apathetic about it. Although there some titles that only have a couple of issues a year can get me chompin' at the bit, I never shout, "All right, Powers is out!" There's a really good story here, and I don't know where Bendis and Oeming are going with it except possibly to Awesometown. I don't want to 'spoil' anything, but there are some shocking developments in this issue, and after reading this issue I got really excited for Issue 16. Let's see if that feeling lasts until it comes out.
Expectation: 3.0
Rating: 4.0
Differential: +1.0

Seven Soldiers: Mister Miracle #2
(Grant Morrison, words; Billy Patton & Freddie Williams II, pencils)

A child of the 80s, the Mr. Miracle I knew was a white guy named Scott Free who hung out with the Justice League and had a sexy giantess for a wife, but I knew very little about the rest of the New Gods aside from a few guest appearances. Morrison's Mister Miracle is a different guy, and the New Gods are nowhere to be found - or are they? In this issue, we're re-introduced to a number of New Gods, re-imagined Morrison-style for this seemingly brand-new universe, and there's plenty of zany action in the form of a drive-by smash-up derby. There are a lot of ideas bouncing around in this issue's but because nothing's really made of them, it's more confusing than entertaining (I'd say a 60/40 ratio). With two artists doing work on this issue, the shifts are noticeable but not distracting, and I'm looking forward to seeing Williams take the rest of this series home - I just hope that the next issue is a little less obtuse.
Expectation: 4.0
Rating: 2.5
Differential: -1.5

December 14, 2005

Fables #44
(Bill Willingham, words; Mark Buckingham, pencils)

For one of my favourite titles, Fables has been letting me down lately. First, Willingham telegraphs the Adversary's true identity almost 20 issues in advance, and then in a flash of misdirection reveals it to be exactly who we thought it was; now, we have the worst case of blocking (in improv terms) I've ever seen. There's a lot of set-up in this issue: Prince Charming and Boy Blue discuss the fallout of Blue's adventures, the D'jinn goes crazy in Baghdad, and the Fabletown residents continue to protest their new Mayor's rule. But it's all for naught as the ending is terribly disappointing, and I'm left to realize that very little actually happened. Buckingham and Leialoha hold up their end with another beautiful-looking issue, but ultimately it's a meringue: looks good, but it's basically empty.
Expectation: 3.5
Rating: 2.0
Differential: -1.5

Comics: Week of November 23

2005-11-28T12:08:00.000-07:00

Five sentences just doesn't seem like enough to describe some of this week's books accurately, but I have done my very best and will keep to it until I have some kind of epiphany, or can actually see some improvement. For now, though, here are twenty sentences on some pretty good books.

Ex Machina #16 - "Off The Grid, Part Two"
(Brian K. Vaughan, words; Tony Harris, pencils)

The first issue in this two-part story took Mayor Hundred out of New York politics and on the road in search of his mother, and this issue wraps things up fairly nicely. I like the look of the flashback scene at the beginning of this issue; the panel arrangement and point of view work to create a disjointed feeling that fits the tone of the action. I'm not particularly thrilled with the "Is Mitchell gay?" thread that's popping up again in this title; I think it's an unneccessary plot point in a series that's full of potential. (Personally, I'd love it if he was functionally asexual after his accident, and only feels twinges of love for a nice, dependable Blackberry or a good-looking sports car.) All in all, a fairly standard issue of an above-average series, but I'm looking forward to the next storyline - "March To War" - with great interest.
Expectation: 3.5
Rating: 3
Differential: -0.5

Jack Cross #4 - "Love Will Get You Killed, Part Four"
(Warren Ellis, words; Gary Erskine, art)

I'm a Ellisoholic - which, in my opinion, should really be "Ellisic"; is there really anything called Ellisohol, and if so, can someone please tell me where can I get some? Anyhow, considering he's putting out 3 different cop/investigator comics right now, and I can't afford to get all of them, I'm afraid Jack Cross, the "Hard Man" himself, gets the boot. There's nothing particularly wrong with it: Ellis has the different characters' clipped, military dialogue down just fine, and in a few places he and Erskine show just how effective decompression can be. Jack Cross is a spy-action movie in comic form, very cinematic and striking, but ultimately it suffers in comparison to the superior art and story found in Desolation Jones and Fell. I gave it four issues, and now I'm afraid I'm going to have to give it a miss.
Expectation: 3
Rating: 2.5
Differential: -0.5

Seven Soldiers: Frankenstein #1
(Grant Morrison, words; Doug Mahnke, art)

As much as I love Karloff, I like my Frankenstein's monster a little less "monosyllabic and cement boot-dragging" and a little more "philosophical and Paradise Lost-quoting"; Morrison and Mahnke have given me the latter. The main thrust of Morrison's Seven Soldiersseries - interdimensional Fae folk bent on the destruction of this world - is an oddly compatable fit with Shelley's monster-hunting monster, who sort of reminds me of a white-collar Hellboy. This is the best I've seen Mahnke's art; he successfully draws beautiful young men and women, overweight pimply-faced dweebs, and a reanimated corpse with equal success. I would have liked to see more of the monster himself (he bookends his own title), and was a little confused by a publishing error on Page 4, but those are minor complaints. Out of the all seven miniseries was the one I was the most worried about, and yet based on the strength of this first issue, it's probably my second-favourite (after Klarion: The Witch-Boy, and trust me, no-one is more surprised than me about that): "Frankenstein Lives!" indeed.
Expectation: 3.5
Rating: 4.0
Differential: +0.5

Seven Soldiers: Zatanna #4
(Grant Morrison, words; Ryan Sook, pencils)

Another Seven Soldiers mini draws to a close with this issue, and I must admit I'm sad to see it go; this Zatanna is the most effective and enjoyable of her many incarnations, and I hope she isn't relegated to "deus ex machina" or "plot point" status after this. Sook's Zatanna is sexy without being vulgar, but more importantly in this issue, his pencils give the reader an excellent look at both the mundane and the mystical - and beyond. Here Morrison mines one of his favourite story veins, what I like to call "the comic book as conscious cultural construct", something he's done in The Filth, Doom Patrol, and most effectively, Animal Man. It's well-done here, and it highlighting the massive intensity of the magical confrontation by suggesting that not even the all-powerful Fourth Wall can contain this fight. This issue finishes off the miniseries with style, and even though I'm irked that the story won't be quite over for another few months, this is a good enough place to pause for now.
Expectation: 4.0
Rating: 4.5
Differential: +0.5

Comics: Week of November 16

2005-11-21T07:38:00.000-07:00

This past week's haul of comics was a fairly mixed bag for me. It stuck to my pattern of "Mostly Good, Mostly DC", but there were a couple of things that really surprised me. Let's hit the rundown.

All-Star Superman #1
(Grant Morrison, words; Frank Quitely, art)

I'm still limiting myself to five sentences here, so let's start off with the following statement: All-Star Superman is almost wall-gnawingly good. Morrison and Quitely have taken what they feel are the essential elements of the Superman mythos (Superman is self-sacrificing and loves Lois, Lois is brilliant and witty, Lex is capital-E Evil, Jimmy is a keener and mildly annoying), distilled them and deliver it in super-concentrated form. After a deceptively simple one-page origin recap, he dialogue and plot run past fairly quickly, the near-absurdity of the story just another example of Morrison's "pharmaceutically-charged Silver Age" writing style. My favourite part of the book is the take on Clark: he's still as huge as Superman, but a slouching, clumsy, plain-looking guy that reminds me of Christopher Reeve's take on the character. It's not as strong a start as some of his Seven Soldiers #1s earlier in the year, but it's a breath of fresh air that makes me seriously re-examine some of my previous purchases of the past few months.
Expectation: 4
Rating: 4.5
Differential: +0.5

Birds of Prey #88 - "Perfect Pitch, Part Two"
(Gail Simone, words; Jack Bennett & Eddy Barrows, pencils)

I started picking this title up a few months ago after hearing nothing but good things about it, and after really enjoying Simone's work on Villains United, but this issue really left me with a bland taste in my mouth. The many plot threads are let to go a little slack, so it's more than a little disjointed: Calculator gets his buddies to torture one of the Birds' allies, Ollie & Dinah fight gangsters and discuss their love life, the Birds go shopping, Huntress works to get in with the mob...a number of interesting but there's no uniting thread through the issue. The art doesn't help matters any, as the looks change along with the scenes. I do like the way Gail Simone writes dialogue that's character-specific and makes for a number of cute little scenes. However, that's not enough to redeem this issue: it was spread too thin over too many stories, which I hope get tied a little tighter in the next issue.
Expectation: 3.5
Rating: 2.5
Differential: -1

Fables #43 - "Arabian Nights (And Days), Part Two"
(Bill Willingham, words; Mark Buckingham, pencils)

This issue sees the continued interactions between Sinbad & the Arabian fables into the mostly-European Fabletown, as well as some more interesting political maneuvering in the Mayor's office. I must say, even though I miss Deputy Mayor Snow White and Sheriff Bigby, the Prince Charming-Beauty-Beast dynamic is really starting to grow on me; Willingham allows more subtlety and less moral absolutism in their characterizations, which makes for more entertaining interactions as well as a better fit for a confused and conflicted Fabletown. Plus, King Cole has shown more ingenuity and intelligence in his limited role these past two issues than his previous tenure as Mayor. The clash of culture is played out quite well here, and although the ending didn't really catch me by surprise, it sets the reader up for an entertaining next issue. Combine that with the creativity of Willingham's page layouts and his iconic pencils (a good fit for the books fairy-tale characters), and Fables remains a book to keep your eye on.
Expectation: 3
Rating: 3.5
Differential: +0.5

Hellblazer #214 - "R.S.V.P., Part One"
(Mike Carey, words; Leonardo Manco, art)

This is the penultimate issue of Carey's run on the title, and it is rather obvious: he's setting a number of things up here that shout "It's the beginning of the end, folks!" Hellblazer #214 is characterized by the two main strengths of Carey's tenure: his John Constantine is intriguing because it's a Gestalt made from the interpretation of previous writers, and he effectively uses all the supporting characters, both living and dead. I'm not sure where John's going to end up after this story is over, but he rarely does either, so in that sense, I'm in respectable company.
Expectation: 3
Rating: 3
Differential: 0

Polly & The Pirates #2 (An October comic, but I got it this week)
(Ted Naifeh, words and art)

I picked this title up because, as an all-ages comic book about a sweet ten-year-old girl's adventures with pirates, it satisfies both my need for pirate comics, and Peach's need for sweet all-ages comics. I must say that I've really taking a liking to Polly Pringle, timid schoolgirl and dubious heir to a pirate empire, and root for her through all her adventures, be them with salty sea dogs or conniving classmates. Naifeh gains big points for humour, adventure, excellent dialogue ("Thank you for your kindness. You may keep the rowboat."), and the use of one of my favourite historical figures. He loses points for sometimes falling into clichés, although much less so than last issue, and for Polly's lack of feet (seriously, she runs around on peglegs). This issue takes all the great things of last month's and improves on them, and I'm really happy that I took the chance on this one, and you should too, especially if you are (or have) a comic book girlfriend.
Expectation: 3
Rating: 4
Differential: +1

Comics: Week of November 9

2005-11-14T07:50:00.000-07:00

And now, the second installment of my paragraph-length reviews. The three comics I bought this week don't have much in common (aside from the over-arching publisher), but I was fairly pleased with each of them.

DMZ #1 - "On The Ground, Part One"
(Brian Wood, words; Riccardo Burchielli & Brian Wood, art)

The premise for this series is intriguing: a group of states (including New Jersey) seceded from the United States five years ago, and we see what it’s like to live in Manhattan Island, the titular de-militarized zone, through the eyes of photography intern Matthew Roth. The series starts in medias res, so I’m not getting as much information as I would like; I know that’s part of the point, that we’re just confused as Roth is, but it means I’m having a hard time really getting into this issue. It’s a good story, and the artists do a good job showing just how decrepit, crumbling, and dirty the city has become. Bottom line: it’s a good first issue, and my interest is suitably peaked.
Expectation: 3
Rating: 3
Differential: 0

Infinite Crisis #2
(Geoff Johns, words; Phil Jiminez, pencils)

For myself and the thousands of fans of DC Comics, this is the biggest event of the last 20 years, but the first issue left me a little underwhelmed. This one is better, mostly because we get a little more forward momentum amidst all the exposition (and there's a LOT of exposition). Johns has recieved a lot of flack for his writing over the past year or so, but I'm enjoying his story so far. Jimenez's art is pretty good; I don't like the way he draws some of the feature characters (Power Girl, Earth-1 Superman), but that's two out of about two hundred, and the art chores in this book would have killed a lesser man. I liked this issue, even moreso for the inclusion of Animal Man and Booster Gold (with SKEETS!), and it's raised the bar for issue 3.
Expectation: 3
Rating: 4
Differential: +1

Jonah Hex #1
(Justin Gray & Jimmy Palmiotti, words; Luke Ross, art)

I know it’s technically one of last week’s comics, but Devon’s glowing endorsement of it made me curious enough to pick it up, and let me tell you, I’m glad I did. The Western genre can be predictable and lame, but Gray and Palmiotti tell an interesting – and self-contained – story that acts both as a good introduction to the character and the world he inhabits. The panel layout echoes the visual style of the great Western films; “widescreen” panels frame the setting, while series of smaller panels move along conversation and action. Ross’s version of Hex looks a lot like Clint Eastwood at times, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing but threw me off the trail once or twice on the first read-through. From the looks of the first issue, I’ll be getting the next few issues of Jonah Hex, but we’ll see if it has the chops to knock one of my titles off my monthly list permanently.
Expectation: 3.5
Rating: 4
Differential: +0.5

Comics: Week of November 2

2005-11-07T18:09:00.000-07:00

I'm not very comfortable writing reviews. Sure, I can rant like the dickens, but I don't think I can use those abilities to make a competent review. So for the next while, I'm going to experiment with writing paragraph-length reviews about the comics I picked up during the week. No more than five sentences, plus The Doc's Patented Ratings Systen: marks out of five for both Expectation and Rating, and the Differential. Because more comics reviews are just what this fine Internet of ours needs. I'll try and keep them fairly spoiler-free, but there's no guarantees, folks.

Desolation Jones #4
(Warren Ellis, words; J.H. Williams III, art)

This is my favourite Warren Ellis title out there right now, and seeing as how I can count four off the top of my head (six if you count Iron Man and Planetary), that's a fairly high rating. This issue puts out quite a bit of plot in between two instances of decompressed violence, and I was very happy with it, on the whole. Ellis doesn’t always give the reader well-defined characters (some that have character traits and dialogue that are fairly interchangeable), but Michael Jones is the most well-rounded character he’s put out since Spider Jerusalem. Williams’s art is not quite as breathtaking as his work on Promethea, but the grittier tone is an excellent fit for the book; I was also particularly pleased with Jose Villarrubia’s use of color in the opening fight scene. My only complaint is that I really wish it was a monthly book, but if as long as it continues with its high level of quality, I’ll keep patiently waiting for the next issue.
Expectation: 4
Rating: 4
Differential: 0

House of M #8
(Brian Michael Bendis, words; Oliver Copiel, pencils)

I have a love-hate relationship with this series: I thought a number of issues were very good, but I also felt that few were un-necessary or, at the worst, just plain bad. I stuck it out, though, because I had an investment after the first four issues and wanted to see how it all turned out. This issue sets up a very different – and interestingly enough from a DC fan’s perspective, not retconned – path for the Marvel Universe, and I was actually shocked by a few of the developments. While the overall storyline felt a little padded, this issue was tight and well-plotted, and it’s in no small part thanks to Bendis’s approach to the key characters. However, this issue did not do the one thing I hoped it might do, which is make me care about Marvel again on a monthly basis; I’ll stick to reading D!’s books when I go to visit.
Expectation: 2.5
Rating: 3.0
Differential: +0.5

Marvel Team-Up #14
(Robert Kirkman, words; Cory Walker, art)

Two Marvel books in one week is an extremely rare occurrence, but I just couldn’t pass up on the Spidey-Invincible combo, especially when it brings Cory Walker back to the character he helped create. The issue has plenty of jokes, a number of which involve the inherent silliness of superhero names, and almost all of them work just fine. The action sequences are good too; I particularly enjoyed the way Invincible decided to deal with Doctor Octopus. However, the book’s main failing is that the inclusion of the teenaged Invincible really points out just how far Spider-Man has fallen from the way I feel he works best: a loser teenager with great responsibility and an incredible secret. He’s just not as effective as a handsome guy with a supermodel wife, which is why I’ll stick to my Ultimate Spider-Man trades – at least, as long as Ultimate Peter Parker remains under-25.
Expectation: 4
Rating: 4.5
Differential: +0.5

Powers #14
(Brian Michael Bendis, words; Michael Avon Oeming, art)

The second chapter in the current storyline opens with another stand-up comedian, this time ranting about the sniping cowards on the Internet (as a non-sniping Internet coward, I take no offense), although I don't know how - or if - it ties in to the rest of the story. Pilgrim and Walker's investigation of the victim / suspect's home with the "assistance" of a mysterious federal agent is interesting, but I was chilled by Pilgrim's chat with Internal Affairs. Bendis's ear for dialogue is almost as good as Elmore Leonard's, which is praise that I don't give out lightly, and Oeming's work this issue is some of the best I've seen him do. Although I don't know where they're going with this storyline, I'm glad Pilgrim's getting some close scrutiny, and I'll be watching this with a great deal of interest.
Expectation: 3.5
Rating: 3.5
Differential: 0

Seven Soldiers: The Bulleteer #1
(Grant Morrison, words; Yanick Paquette, pencils)

I've found the Seven Soldiers miniseries consistently above-par, so I was shocked when I found The Bulleteer to be simply "okay". Just like in the previous series, the book has it's share of crazy-but-brilliant ideas; much less so than some of the others, but that's not neccessarily a bad thing. Morrison's Bulleteer, Alix Harrower, is a twist on the reluctant hero; a woman who's gained her powers (strength and invulnerability) thanks to her husband's twin obsessions with beauty and superheroes. The psychosexual themes of the book are consistently mirrored in Paquette's art, and that's where the biggest trouble comes in: every image of Alix looks like a pinup, which makes the book look more like a collection of cheesecake shots than a series of panels intended to tell a forward-moving story. My first impression of this series is that in both writing and art it's a straight-ahead middle-of-the-road superhero book, and as such it doesn't quite live up to the expectations that the previous miniseries have laid out for it.
Expectation: 4
Rating: 2.5
Differential: -1.5

Event Announcement - Pop Culture Fair

2005-09-26T12:44:00.000-06:00

Ladies and gentlemen...ah, who am I kidding. Gentlemen. This Sunday, October 2nd marks the Fall 2005 Pop Culture Fair, an event that I heard through the grapevine was being cancelled this year. But thankfully, I heard wrong. So head down to the Alberta Aviation Museum any time between 10:00 and 4:00, with $4 in your pocket, and scan an airplane hangar for comics, records, cds, figurines, and other collectibles. Surround yourself with nerds in scenes like these. And give me a ride: ETS service sucks on Sundays.

Movie - Just Like Heaven

2005-09-15T14:14:00.000-06:00

It's worth noting that I'm reviewing this movie after my review of The 40-Year-Old Virgin, in which I gave a mild tongue-lashing to romantic comedies of the cheesy chick-flick variety. I would like to make perfectly clear that I don't hate all romantic comedies: When Harry Met Sally and It Happened One Night are on my list of Top 100 Movies, and I have been pleasantly surprised by a number of others. However, I often take these movies to task for having their hearts in the wrong place, and using film clichés that, when taken to heart buy unsuspecting filmgoers, undermine real relationships. (One of my most memorable movie-watching experiences happened when I laughed uproariously during Bridget Jones's Diary at a part that I thought was being played for laughs, but was apparently dead serious. The rest of the audience was not pleased.) I am a harsh judge of these films, and I make no apologies for it. So, who's ready for some fun?!

The only reasons I went to see Just Like Heaven were: 1) it was free, and 2) my Peach loves Reese Witherspoon, and I figured it was a good date that would make up for the fact that she ends up not liking many of the movies we go see. I wasn't expecting much from it, which was a good thing in hindsight, because there were points when I was actually enjoying myself. It's a passably good movie, and while the flaws aren't fatal, they can certainly maim if you're not careful.

Reese Witherspoon plays Elizabeth, a hospital resident who has given up on the rest of her life in order to do the right thing by her patients. When she is finally rewarded for her 26-hour shifts with a coveted job at her hospital, she (reluctantly) heads to her sister's house for a blind date. David (Mark Ruffalo) is a deeply depressed landscape gardener who now apparently spends all of his time drinking and yet can somehow afford a very nice furnished apartment in San Francisco (which he picked because it has a nice couch to slack on). He would be perfectly content to consume can after can of beer for the rest of his life, but Elizabeth's spirit pops up in the apartment claiming it's hers and that he needs to move out. David figures she's a ghost, but the psychic New Age bookstore owner Darryl (Napoleon Dynamite) thinks otherwise, so the couple go all over town trying to find out exactly what happened to Elizabeth. Will they find out what's going on and fall in love? I won't tell you here, but if you've seen the trailer, or for that matter, any other romantic comedy, I think you know the answer.

The dialogue is sharp and funny, and actually had me laughing out loud. What's more, in the mouths of Witherspoon and Ruffalo (which would make a great name for a 60s folk duo), it actually crackles; they give it more much more substance than it would have if you just read it on the page. What's more, the two actors have so much chemistry that, if they were a couple in real life, would either have spontaneously combusted or reacted and formed a new organic compound. (A sentence that adds more fuel to the "science geeks shouldn't write movie reviews" fire.)

The movie falls down in three places. Firstly, the pace is really wonky. For instance, they drag out the "I'm not a ghost, you're just crazy!" routine waaay too long. I guess they wanted to break the 90 minute barrier or something, but it was too jokey and it played out very quickly. Secondly, the plot is ridiculous; these two people are supposedly intelligent, a doctor and an architect, and they can't figure out how to solve this little mystery? (I know, someone with a 1000+ comic collection calling a movie with a "boy-human meets girl-ghost who's not a ghost" plot is also calling a number of kitchen devices black, but I stand by it.) So many things could have been dealt with if David or Elizabeth had actually sat down and figured out a plan as to how they coudl fix things, but instead they run around town having wacky hijinks and quiet serene moments where they share their feelings. Which doesn't mean they shouldn't be silly and sorrowful, but they could have been smart about it as well. Finally, any movie who does a body-possessing scene runs the risk of being unfavourably compared to the fantastic All Of Me, another man-loves-ghost romantic-comedy. As funny as Mark Ruffalo is, he is no Steve Martin, and I watched the rest of the Just Like Heaven with All Of Me's spectre looming over it.

Just Like Heaven is a better-than-average romantic comedy, which means that it's better than about 55% of the other one out there. I'd give it 3 stars out of 5, but then again, I'm not exactly the target audience. The girls that came to see it with me absolutely loved it, though. My point is: if you're in the mood for a romantic comedy, you could do worse, but if you want to just see a good movie, you could do much better.

Movie - The 40-Year-Old Virgin

2005-09-04T10:35:00.000-06:00

The events that lead up to this review actually start way back when Anchorman was first released. As a rule, I can't stand Will Ferrell. I can't remember a single thing he's done that was funny, although to be fair, I haven't seen the infamous "More Cowbell" sketch. What I saw of him from SNL, Old School, the horrendous Zoolander (sorry, Ben), and the MTV Movie Awards...well, it didn't inspire me with confidence. But then it got really good reviews from sources I trusted, and eventually I watched it on DVD. And laughed myself silly. Ferrell was actually funny, the script was loose in parts but still packed with jokes, and the other actors were fantastic. The standout, of course, was Steve Carell as Brick Tamlin, the mentally retarded weather reporter. He nailed the character: his physical humour was top-notch, and every joke rang true because of his great comic timing. (My favourite Brick moment, for the record, is "I stabbed a guy in the heart!") The jokes never went too far into "gaggy' territory, though, thanks to the power of his delivery. He was in the moment every second he was on screen, and it made him the standout actor in the movie.

His performance in The 40-Year-Old Virgin is even better. Carell plays Andy Stitzer, the titular character, who works at an electronics store, has few - if any - friends, and a collection of geeky paraphernalia that anyone in the EGS would gladly give a finger or two for. After his three co-workers (Seth Rogen, Romany Malco, and Paul Rudd) discover that he's a virgin, they give him advice on women, how to score, and relationships. (This would be fine, except that these three men are not exactly doing very well in the relationship front themselves...) Meanwhile, despite his new friends' best efforts, Andy begins a relationship with Trish (Catherine Keener, whom I adore), a woman who runs the "We Sell Your Stuff On EBay" store across the street from Andy's work. The two of them hit it off, and decide to wait twenty dates before having sex. Will the boys get Andy laid before then? Will his inexperience lead to an unsatisfied Trish? Will Paul Rudd continue to do offbeat comedies that get him mainstream recognition as well as indy films that get him critical acclaim? The answers to all those questions, save one, are answered by the end of the movie.

First of all, all the principal actors are top-notch. First of all, Catherine Keener takes the second-hardest role in the movie and knocks it out of the park; she's lovable, she's tender, she's bitchy, she's gorgeous, she's fantastic. I have not seen a movie with her in it without falling over myself in praise of her performance. People, if you haven't seen Living in Oblivion or Being John Malkovitch, do it. (Hell, she was even good in 8mm...) Rudd, Rogen, and Malco take their roles seriously, and do exceptionally well with them. But the movie's shining star is Carell, who makes you actually care about the main character, not just "oh, I hope he does okay" kind of fake-care that you get in most movies. He's charming, sweet, and the best thing is, he doesn't take the fact that he's a virgin as a bad thing: it's the butt of a few jokes, sure, but it's not shameful because he doesn't think to be ashamed of it.

Carell co-wrote the screenplay with director Judd Apatow (of the cult television shows Freaks and Geeks and Undeclared), and it's a good one. The conversations the men have are real conversations, not ones women want guys to have, and not ones some less comfortable guys would like to admit having. What's more, the situations the characters get into are real, not the low-calorie versions most movies give their audiences. The 40-Year-Old Virgin is a film with many levels: gross-out humour (but very little, I might add), romantic comedy, buddy movie, physical comedy, and a musical number (!!!). This could have been a flat, uninteresting, one-joke movie, and it's to both men's credit that it's so much more.

The 40-Year-Old Virgin is an excellent movie, possibly my favourite of the year so far. It's a good date movie - if the lady half of the date can handle some decidedly "male" moments - but it's a better guy movie. It's the guy version of a chick flick; I would categorize it as a "dick flick", if you can say that without immediately thinking of John Holmes. Leave the girls to their A Lot Like Loves and their The Perfect Mans: I'll take The 40-Year-Old Virgin, some popcorn, and a beer - if I can have the beer beforehand.

Video Game: EarthBound

2005-08-16T20:41:00.000-06:00

While many of my friends are currently obsessed with new-fangledy video games such as World of Warcraft and the like, there has only been one true capital-'O' Obsession for this video game geekling: EarthBound. My brothers and I rented the game for our Super Nintendo many years ago, and while we all enjoyed it, my feelings about the game bordered on the near-unhealthy. Early video-game RPGs, like Final Fantasy, were all about the sword-and-sorcery: a band of intrepid adventurers - I always picked Fighter, Thief, Black Wizard, and White Wizard - wandered a mystical landscape, pitting their skills and weapons against goblins, ogres, dragons, and other mythical creatures. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but eventually it became the same old show.

EarthBound was like no game I'd ever played. You're a ten-year-old boy who awakes in the middle of the night to examine a mysterious meteor that crash-landed in your town. After you check out the meteor, your annoying neighbor enlists you to help find his little brother who's gotten lost, and along the way you meet up with a bee from the future who has traveled back in time to help you in your quest. Armed with a tee-ball bat, you and the bee - who, if you didn't catch it the first time, is from the future - combat a powerful alien, and you return the boys to their home...at which point he is killed by a flyswatter. I was hooked; I had never played a game like this before. This past week, I got my old SNES back, and I was just as excited to play the game as I was ten years ago.

EarthBound could be my favourite video game of all time. I have not had more fun playing an RPG in my entire life. Instead of creatures of legend, the game pits you against a mysterious cult that paints everything blue, the city police force, aliens, posessed department store goods, zombies, robots, piles of vomit, and, of course, silly hippies. The main character makes mincemeat out of these monsters, armed with his trusty baseball bat (or yo-yo) and psychic powers, but he's not alone. His companions include a girl who also has phenomenal psychic abilities and wields a frying pan, a nerdy guy who can make incredible machines out of broken tubes and spray cans, and a mystic ninja (no, not him) who gains his powers through studying the ancient philosophy of Moo.

It's silly, but it's fun. It not only creatively uses the conventions of RPGs up to that point, but examines them as well - sometimes to re-invent them, sometimes just to poke fun at them. Sure you have to talk to other people in the game, break into houses and look in drawers and presents, and slay wandering monsters, just like Zelda and FF. But every once in a while, you get a laugh out of it. Like the guy in the sleazy nightclub who says "I don't know why you talked to me. I have nothing informative to say, and nothing useful to give you. Do you think it's odd that I would be here?" Taking the conventions and playing with them takes a kind of meta-awareness that I find very appealing.

If you're expecting phenomenal graphics or fast-paced gameplay, look elsewhere: this is a 16-bit game, after all. Playing EarthBound is like watching old movies and being amazed at what they were able to come up with using limited resources. It's challenging and fun, a game you can curse at when it gets tough and laugh at...pretty much the rest of the time. If you can somehow track it down, I highly recommend it.

Television: Family Guy

2005-07-21T15:37:00.000-06:00

(I'm going to keep this far more brief than my last two, partly because, ye gods, they were long, and partly because this shouldn't take much time.)

When Family Guy was cancelled in 2002, I was marginally upset. I'd not had cable television for a while, so I'd fallen out of touch with the show, but I remembered liking it when it first aired in 1999. The revelation that Mr. Tumnus was responsible for the missing dryer socks had me in stitches, and from that moment on, I considered myself a "fan" of the show. So, when it was announced that FOX was reviving the show thanks to successful DVD sales and positive re-run ratings numbers, I looked forward to the new hijinks. However, when it became time to start voicing the new episodes, producer Seth MacFarlane found that he had lost the original scripts, and decided to write the entire season's worth of scripts in one weekend, locking himself and the other writers in a cabin in the Yukon, subsisting on nothing but cheap liquor and jellybeans.

Okay, I made that last part up. But after catching up on my episodes - thanks to my ex-downstairs roommate for leaving behind a VCR that actually works - I have to say that this season is...I don't want to say bad, so let's just say not good. In its first three seasons, Family Guy used to their advantage three writing trademarks: obscure pop culture references, cut away scenes, and the "repetition is funny" joke. Singly or in combination, they were scenes that had me rolling around in laughter. The scene where Peter skins his knee, the introduction of Mayor Adam West, and even Mr. Tumnus: these were jokes that should not have worked, but they did. They don't any more.

Sometimes I'm amused by the episodes, especially the obscure pop culture references - He-Man and Battle Cat? Fast Times at Ridgemont High? Herculoids? A-Ha!? - but it's just not worth my time any more. Family Guy lost me around the time that Peter fought an animated chicken for two solid minutes, instead of actually moving the plot or doing something entertaining. And it's not an isolated incident. I watched two episodes yesterday, and they did it again - Stewie mocking Brian about his novel for at least 30 seconds but seemed like an eternity [Ep 7] and a scene where the guys vomit for over a minute [Ep 8]. If you need to fill up time that badly, I'd rather watch another two minutes of goddamn commercials. The writing this year is stale and LAZY now. And their scenes that "push the lines of good taste" aren't shocking, they're just sad and boring.

The staff is trying too hard to re-capture the glory days, and it's just not working. Family Guy has become the old friend who used to be funny but now does the same schtick like it's a parody of their former self. And I'm going to stop hanging around that guy.

Television on DVD: Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Season 6

2005-07-05T18:16:00.000-06:00

One of the odd traditions that Ninja, Jago and I have is that we get together and watch TV shows on DVD. It began with 24, where we were amazed by the odds Jack Bauer had to face with each passing hour, and astounded by his daughter Kim’s incredibly lame crises. (“Help, my head’s stuck in a banister! Call my dad at CTU!”) It soon moved on to other shows such as Monk, starring Ninja’s favourite actor Tony Shalhoub, and the shows of writer-director-fashion nightmare Joss Whedon – Angel and Buffy The Vampire Slayer.

I’ve seen all the seasons of Buffy, but it’s a great show and a lot of fun to watch them again. It’s particularly fun to watch them with the guys, who’ve never seen them before, especially when Ninja curls up in a ball on the couch and wraps himself up in his Crying Blanket – so named because he often shrieks like a girl and uses the blanket to muffle the sound. Over the past three weeks, we ploughed our way through the sixth season of Buffy The Vampire Slayer, all 22 episodes. It’s the fastest we’ve ever gone through any series, and while part of it is likely due to my prompting, I think it’s mostly because we just wanted more after every episode.

This season marked a number of major changes in the show’s direction. It was the season of the “real world”; after high school is over, responsibility can hit you like a sixteen-ton-weight on a British accountant, and Buffy, Willow, and Xander had to start growing up. It was also Buffy’s first season on UPN, and the network let the writers do pretty much whatever they wanted, no matter how controversial or over-the-top it was. The subject matter got dark, it got sexy, and it got very depressing.

To sum up: Buffy (Sarah Michelle Gellar) comes back from the dead, and she’s miserable; to dull the pain she begins a destructive, if sexually fulfilling, relationship with Spike (James Marsters), who is becomes obsessed with her. Willow (Alyson Hannigan) starts getting addicted to black magic, sabotaging her relationship with the group, especially Tara (Amber Benson). Giles (Anthony Stewart Head) leaves for England – twice. Craving attention since everyone else is too wrapped up with his or her problems to help her with her own, Dawn (Michelle Trachtenberg) becomes a kleptomaniac. Things seem to get better though, partly because it seems the characters start realizing they’re destroying themselves, and partly because of the only ray of sunshine in the whole show: Xander (Nicholas Brendon) and Anya (Emma Caulfield)’s relationship and upcoming wedding. Then…Xander freaks out and leaves Anya, and things start heading downhill again, fast, past the point you thought they couldn’t get any worse. By the end, people are dead and some relationships are shattered, but every character that’s still standing has a new beginning. Oh, and the fan-favourite episode Once More With Feeling fits in there somewhere too.

Season 6 created a division that separated a lot of fans and critics. Many people saw it as a betrayal, a bastardization of the tone and morality of the rest of the series. Other people welcomed the change, embraced the darkness and wallowed in it. When the last episode finished, there were very few people standing in the middle of the road: you loved it or you hated it.

I fall into the loved it category. I think it’s the show’s best season – possibly second-best compared to Season 2, but it’s a tight race. It’s not perfect, mind you; it has its flaws, and I’m going to lay them out in the open. Warts and all, though, these 22 episodes got me caring about the show again after the mess that was Season 5; it’s the most technically and creatively impressive season, and it’s got powerful performances that keep me coming back.

First: the bad. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that Dawn was wasted for much of the season. They didn’t have much for her to do, and she was part of the reason the middle part of the season started to drag. Michelle Trachtenberg has skills, but when you put a good actor in an underdeveloped role, there’s not much she can do with it. Willow’s unhealthy relationship with magic (read: magic = drugs), while an excellent idea, was poorly executed: much of the dialogue surrounding that topic was a little too after-school-special for my liking. Another low point was Buffy’s touch me / don’t touch me tango with Spike. Yes, it’s an unhealthy relationship, and yes, she tries to get away but keeps being pulled back in, but there is such a thing as too much. The show always had an element of soap opera, but this season went overboard.

However, the good far outweighs the bad. Many of the performances were the best they’ve ever been; when the writers put more depth and emotion on the page, the actors rose to the challenge. Anthony Stewart Head, even in a reduced role, had my eyes riveted to the screen. Amber Benson developed Tara to the point where I actually cared about her, as opposed to just Willow’s girlfriend. My two favourite actors, though, were Nick Brendon and Emma Caulfield. Reduced to comic relief for many a season, they handled both comedy and tragedy with ease. I was particularly impressed with Brendon, who I assumed was just playing himself for the first five seasons. He exceeded all of my expectations in the last third of the series, and while he’s never going to be “Five Time Emmy Award-Winner Nicholas Brendon”, I will defend him against his most violent critics.

You can’t talk about Season 6 without mentioning Once More With Feeling. On paper, “Buffy The All-Singing-All-Dancing Vampire Slayer” just doesn’t work. And it almost doesn’t: some of the performances were amateurish, and some of the songs were overly simplistic. It could be further argued that the episode was just Joss Whedon being completely self-indulgent and torturing the cast and crew. But in the end, it worked: it was more than just an exercise in what you can do on television, it was an integral part of the season. Everyone put a lot of work into it, and it shows. Not the best Buffy episode of all-time, as some might argue, but it’s a very good one.

The Trio, Season Six’s dominant villains, have been much maligned as well. Last year, Buffy fought a god, and this year, we get three Star Trek nerds? A lot of people didn’t care for them, but I think they served two important functions. Firstly, they added a lot of comic relief to a very dark season, which only underscores the point that they weren’t really the Bad Guys. Sure, they did bad things, but this season was about more than the most recent threat to Sunnydale. The Trio were just one of the many problems the group had to confront this season, not simply the “Big Bad” that kept getting bigger and badder every season. Secondly, the group – particularly Warren (Adam Busch) – showed us that human beings can be just as scary as vampires, demons, or The Government. True horror isn’t about the new monster of the week; it’s about the dark places in the souls and minds of ordinary human beings.

I end with a comment on the show’s final episode. Full of the pain of everyone in the world and unable to contain herself, Willow sets out to raise a demonic temple and save the world. Nobody who’s been touched by mystic forces can stop her, which rules out pretty much everyone – Buffy (Slayer), Giles (Quasi-Magical and Nearly Dead), Anya (Demon), Dawn (Ball of Mystic Energy), Spike (Vampire and Out of Town) – except Xander. He confronts Willow, saying that if he’s going to die it’s going to be beside his best friend, and saves the world by the power of his unconditional love.

While doing some research for this rant, I came across an article that came down on the final episode because of its obvious Christian bent: “The world was saved from destruction - from a woman bent on vengeance, from a Jewish witch - by the unconditional love of a poor carpenter.” While it’s an interesting interpretation of the episode, I honestly can’t see it that way. First of all, the show has had such a secular tone over the six seasons, and I can’t see the writers consciously plotting out a “Xander equals Jesus” storyline. Secondly, I think it’s a far too symbolic interpretation of the scene: Season 6 was about life and human nature, its dark side and its capacity for goodness. Xander embodies human frailty and human strength, and I found it very satisfying to see him have his place as an integral part of the group, showing what an ordinary guy was capable of in the face of impossible odds.

Say what you will about the soap opera, the rubber suits, and the (sometimes) obvious stunt doubles: Buffy The Vampire Slayer is excellent television, and Season Six is some of the very best the series has to offer. I can't really recommend it to anyone, because if you haven't seen Buffy, this is not the place to start. But if you have seen it, I encourage you to re-visit some of the episodes. They may not be fun-filled, laugh-a-minute slay-fests, but they show just how good broadcast television can be.

Suggested Episodes: Once More, With Feeling; Tabula Rasa; Hell's Bells; Entropy; Grave

Comic: Hellboy - The Island #1

2005-06-27T23:33:00.000-06:00

Cover for Hellboy - The Island #1

After two years at the bottom of the ocean - and a four year absence from comic shelves - Mike Mignola's Hellboy made his triumphant return last Wednesday in Hellboy - The Island #1. To me, the strangest thing was the lack of publicity; I had heard that it was coming out, but didn't know when or where. I mean, the movie brought in close to $100 million worldwide, so they have a fanbase: you'd figure they'd want to at least give the comic stores some posters or something...anyhow. This isn't about Dark Horse's PR Department, it's about the book. And it's a damn fine one.

The story's a little convoluted: in the present, Hellboy surfaces on an island surrounded by the skeletons of wrecked ships and finds himself facing an old enemy, while in the past, a priest confronts a heretic with his sins. The stories shift in a surreal fashion, and by the end of the first issue, you know something's gone terribly wrong, but you're not sure what it was or what it means. Some might see the unclear story as bad writing, but I think it's a good narrative strategy: it's Hellboy's first time above water, so he's probably a little groggy himself, and keeping the audience in the dark is a classic horror convention because it works.

The book's strengths have always been Mignola's characterization of Hellboy and his visual style, and this book has them in spades. Hellboy could have been a really melodramatic character; the demon who rejects his true nature, unaware of his origins or his true history. Mignola makes him a blue-collar guy, who likes brawling, boozing, and the occasional classic work of literature. His character is compelling simply because he's an ordinary guy who's put in extraordinary situations, who just happens to be spawned from the netherworld. My favourite line from the book - "Don't mess with me lady. I've been drinking with skeletons." - sums up his situation quite succinctly.

Mignola also give us a visual feast in this issue. His art is highly stylized, panels containing only what is absolutely needed for that part of the scene. In the close-ups, facial expressions are overwhelming and the backgrounds are single colors with little detail, and in shots of vast backgrounds or large-scale fight scenes, his characters can lack even the simplest of facial details. And through it all, huge black shadows fall across recessed hallways, ancient buildings, and weathered faces that populate this world. The art is striking and instantly recognizable, and Mignola in top form in this issue.

Hellboy - The Island is only a two-issue series, and that's the only bad thing I can say about it. After four years, I simply want more Hellboy, more often. But I'll make due with what I can get.

(Best suggestion from Blogger's spellcheck: "Hellboy? What the hell does that mean? He must be thinking elbow.")

Comic: Stormbreaker: The Saga of Beta Ray Bill

2005-06-17T21:30:00.000-06:00

(Note: Ninja - don't read this until you're finished the series. No real spoilers, I just don't want to inadvertently ruin your enjoyment of the series.)

When I found out that Marvel comics killed Thor and all the Asgardians in the "Ragnarok" storyline, I wasn't that concerned. I hadn't been reading Marvel comics for a while, and I certainly hadn't been reading Thor. But then I read that Mike Avon Oeming, the guy who penned "Ragnarok" and who draws the very excellent Powers, was writing a Beta Ray Bill miniseries, and my exact words were "Hell yes!"

(Beta Ray Bill - Best Dressed Space Horse, 1985, 1987, 1992, 2005.)

In brief: Beta Ray Bill first appeared in Thor #337. He was a biomechanically altered being who was the guardian of a dying race. Thor believed he was a threat to Earth, and went off for one of those necessary big fight scenes, during which Bill disarmed Thor, and then picked up the mystical hammer Mjolnir. Thor was surprised - as were the readers - because it was thought that only Thor was worthy enough to hold the weapon. The two met up again in Asgard, where Odin decided that they should engage in mortal combat to see who was the most worthy. After another long fight, Bill beat Thor, but refused to kill such a worthy adversary. Odin was so thankful that Bill spared his son's life that he gave Bill an enchanted mace that was almost as powerful as Mjolnir, called Stormbreaker. And so began the legend of Beta Ray Bill, the most powerful horse in the Marvel Universe.

When I was a kid, I was mesmerized by this guy. Someone who's stronger and more relentless than Thor? The only person worthy enough to hold Mjolnir (that is, before they let anyone hold it, including Captain America, Superman, Wonder Woman, and...Spider-Man?)? Who has a talking spaceship? And is the last hope of a doomed race? This is the kind of space opera my five-year-old brain, still reeling from the spectacle that was Return of the Jedi, could really get behind.

So. Now it's 2005, and the book that nobody wanted - except Ninja, myself, and about thirty other people - is finished its six issue run. How was it?

Okay, I guess. I mean, space opera is not a genre that pops up in a lot of comics, but this was a pretty good one. Oeming and writing partner Dan Berman go absolutely insane with the plot, realizing that they need to touch on a whole lot of history in only six issues. Suffice it to say that they involve the destruction of Asgard, the destruction of Bill's home world, a visit from The Devourer of Planets, portals to alternate dimensions, four huge interstellar battles, and Skuttlebutt, the best talking spaceship of all-time (I'm looking at you, Andromeda). It's a return to the tradition of Jim Starlin-esque space comics, which might be too implausible for some readers, but I was gigglingly happy for five issues. (Only five, you say? Just you wait; all will be explained.)

The dialogue, by comparison, is weak. They cut back on the flowery prose that was a trademark of the Thor comics - god, how I missed "I say thee nay!" - which should have made for more even-handed dialogue all around. But they put conventional figures of speech and contractions in Bill's mouth, and it just doesn't work. A guy can't say "Don't sweat it, girl" and "I call upon thee to smite this evil thing that would destroy us all!!!" in the same comic. He just can't.

Even with teeth-gritting dialogue and an incredulous plot, Stormbreaker was totally worth what I paid for it, because Andrea DiVito's art brought the entire thing to life for me. The galaxy-spanning fights were gorgeous; I could almost feel the power behind every blow and burned with Bill's fury. The smaller, more personal scenes were nicely drawn, too, with touches of tenderness and real emotion that the dialogue didn't always convey. Good story, great art, and the return of one Marvel's most overlooked characters, this series hit all the right points. I give the first five issues a solid recommendation.

The sixth issue, though...I just don't know. At the end of Issue 5, Beta Ray Bill is pounding all hell out of yet another foe in the fiery ruins of Asgard, flashes of magical energy all around, and the sound of his mighty hammer overpowering the thunder in the sky. At the beginning of Issue 6, we open on...a homeless guy who almost gets hit by a car? Driven by a guy who can turn into a giant mutant pig monster? And then...Spider-Man? What the hell is Spider-Man doing here!?! This last issue is stunningly bad. Using my previous Jedi reference, it's as if Vader throws the Emperor over the banister, and then you cut to a very confused Indiana Jones having margaritas on the beach. It makes absolutely no sense, and it's very unsatisfying

Putting Bill on Earth takes him way out of his element, and it takes the punch out of the previous five issues. He's supposed to be a starfaring Norse alien with a talking spaceship, not living in Manhattan being "just another superhero". I was left feeling foolish for enjoying the grand adventure of the earlier issues, and resenting that Spider-Man had to pop up to legitimize the series for the typical Marvel reader.

Stepping back for a moment, I realize I'm being a cranky guy who rants on the Internet about comics, one step away from saying crap like "Bring back Hawkeye!" or "Blue Beetle 4ever!" Really though, I'm just trying to give a review of what was a very promising series. I thought the first five issues were solid gold, and comics-minded people should track down some copies and read them. Stormbreaker: The Saga of Beta Ray Bill gets an overall rating of 6/10; with the breakdown being 8/10, 8/10, 7/10, 7/10, 7/10, and 1/10.

Movie: Last Man Standing (1996)

2005-06-07T01:23:00.000-06:00

Cross-posted from Worst Ninja Ever.

Say what you will about Bruce Willis, but I think he's a mighty fine actor with a fine selection of enjoyable movies that reside, or should reside, on my DVD shelf. One of these films which has recently made its way into my DVD collection is the classic re-telling of a classic film based on an even more classic novel. That's right, I'm talking about "Last Man Standing" (1996), the Walter Hill film which stars Willis among a stellar cast that includes Christopher Walken, David Patrick Kelly and Ned Eisenberg.

This dusty, sun-baked film follows one John Smith (Willis), a selfish, uncompromising man who drifts into a desert hamlet near the Mexican border and becomes embroiled in a gang war between an Italian gang and an Irish one. The two groups have entered an uneasy ceasefire while each is trying to out-think the other, only to have their carefully-laid truce broken by the newcomer, John Smith, who happily and adroitly plays one side against the other in exchange for a fat payoff.

In his machinations, Smith begins to make enemies on both sides: first, by embarrassing the Italian lieutenant, Girogio (Michael Imperioli), and then by refusing to work for Doyle, the Irish boss (Kelly). Not about to let anyone stop him from getting what he wants, Smith even goes so far as to seduce the Italian boss's moll and stand up to the Irish gang's unstoppable enforcer, Hickey (an unusually animated Walken).

But all is not remorseless killing and guns, guns, guns for Smith. He finds himself sympathizing with the women attached to the gangs, so much so that his unbreakable mask of ice starts to crack. He finds he cares less and less about the money and playing the gangs against each other, and more for the welfare and safety of these women. He is nearly too late to help the moll, who comes to him badly beaten and with one ear savagely cut off by the Italian boss and his cronies, but he spends the bulk of the second half of the film dealing with the Irish boss's reluctant girlfriend, who wants only to return to Mexico to be with her daughter.

While the amount of male posturing and gunplay in "Last Man Standing" is expected, the depth of the characters is a welcome relief from the cliches which might otherwise make this another forgettable western movie. To be honest, the John Smith character isn't much more than the stone cold killer with a heart under a hard shell borne of heartbreak and pain, but director Walter Hill surrounds him with such shining supporting characters like the bartender, Joe Monday (William Sanderson), and the ineffectual yet noble sheriff Ed Galt (Bruce Dern). The small cast only serves to emphasize Smith's almost hesitant interactions with others, almost unwilling to treat anyone as human until it is almost too late.

I'd seen the movie before and remember enjoying it, but it wasn't until I watched it again that I discovered why I like it so much. It's not an action-packed, explosion-a-minute kill-fest like the Die Hard franchise, and it doesn't have the colourful, surreal quirkiness of The Fifth Element. What it does have is atypical, sympathetic characters that surprise the viewer. And a delightful surprise it is, too.

Doyle is a typical gang boss, sure, but his weakness isn't just the girl he's all but forced to be his companion; it's the love and devotion he genuinely feels for her. When Smith releases the girl from her open prison, Doyle grieves for her loss and implores Smith more than once to help him look for her, even after Doyle discovers that Smith is the one to release her. The almost legendary Hickey is shown to be more than just a little human when it comes time for a final showdown, and Walken plays it up to almost comic effect.

This movie, like Sergio Leone's "A Fistful of Dollars" (1964), is a re-telling of the 1961 Akira Kurosawa film, "Yojimbo," starring the immortal Toshiro Mifune. "Yojimbo" itself is based on the 1927 Dashiell Hammett first novel, "Red Harvest" (1929).

Album: Mezmerize (System of a Down)

2005-05-26T22:08:00.000-06:00

I first got into System of a Down in 2002 when I heard my brother's copy of Toxicity. I guess for me, 2002 was just the right year for frustrated, angry, loud metal music, because I almost devoured that album during the first month I listened to it. Daron Malakian's guitar lines came at me fast and furious, and Serj Tankian's voice was like nothing I'd ever heard before: angry and melodic, with an almost-comic delivery that really intrigued me. Steal This Album wasn't as strong an effort as Toxicity, but it was still a good album that had them expanding lyrically and musically. Their music was intelligent, melodic, and chaotic, and I loved every minute of it. With two albums (this was before I'd listened to their equally great self-titled debut), System of a Down had carved out their own important niche in the "Angry and Loud" section of my musical palate.

When I picked up the new album Mezmerize, I anticipated another very strong outing, full of vitriolic lyrics and frustrating guitar lines, and I got that in spades. With lyrics like B.Y.O.B.'s "Why don't presidents fight the war? / Why do they always send the poor?" the band keeps churning out their anti-authoritarian views (the recent U.S. election gave them plenty of fuel for their musical furnace). The lyrics are sometimes repetitive - one song has a total of six different lines - but they're usually meaningful and almost always singable.

They also keep pushing the limits of what traditional "hard rock" music has to sound like: I've always enjoyed bands that experiment with different sounds, and S.o.a.D. has a wide range of influences to draw from. For example, one of my favourite songs on the album, "Radio/Video" is metal peppered with influences from Armenian folk music. Another song "Question!", goes back and forth between choppy guitars and near-shouting to gentle acoustic guitars and a beautiful lyricism - and there's a stringed instrument in the background I can't identify, but it's nothing that lesser hard-rock groups would use. The songs shift tempo, dynamic, and lyrical content with a very calculated chaos, and it's a place I really like to be.

Except - it's not all good. There are two things that keep this album from matching the quality of those that came before it. I was suspicious of the first one before I even heard the music, from the moment I opened the package. On Toxicity, Malakian is credited as "Guitars / Vocals"; on Mezmerize, he's credited as "Vocals / Guitars". This is reflected by his vocal output on the album, and it is NOT a good thing. His voice is good for harmony vocals, especially high backing vocals, but he is not cut out to be a lead vocalist - he just doesn't have the chops to carry a whole song. Or even half of a song.

The other frustrating point isn't a quality that's overarching through the album, but rather one single song. "Old School Hollywood" is an example of all the things that can go wrong with a S.o.a.D. song going wrong all at once. Lyrics that make no sense, Malakian's whiny vocals on what passes for a verse, and the music almost sounds like Andrew W.K. (note: that means bad). Plus, having it back-to-back with the similarly-titled and far superior "Lost in Hollywood" just sets you up for unfavourable comparisons.

So really, aside from those two things, I can recommend this album with only a little trepidation. If I was going to give it a number ranking - and I am - I'd give it 7 out of 10; respectable, but not great. I recommend it to people who like hard rock or people who like Michael Moore, or people who like hard rock and Michael Moore.

Recommended Tracks: Radio/Video; Question!; Sad Statue; B.Y.O.B.

Comic: Desolation Jones

2005-05-19T23:38:00.000-06:00

When I picked up my comics last week at my local Commick Shoppe, the man behind the counter looked over my choices and asked me, "What's the excitement about Desolation Jones?" "Warren Ellis," I replied. His response was a frown and a harrumph. Which I can sort of understand: some people really can't get behind Ellis's work. I think a lot of it has to do with the Glorious Bastard character type, which is a character that Ellis does very often - think Elijah Snow, Jenny Sparks, Miranda Zero, Lazarus Churchyard, and the man himself, Spider Jerusalem. The thing is, not only does Ellis write them very often, he usually does it rather well. Possibly because they're all extensions of himself and his outlook on the world, to some extent or another, but that's not something I want to get into here.

Plus - for good or ill - the man got me reading comic books again. The first time I picked up an issue of Transmetropolitan, in my friend Colin's apartment, I hadn't been reading comics for three or four years. It wasn't any conscious decision: the comic store in my home town had pulled up stakes overnight, leaving me without a supplier. But when I flipped through that first issue, I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, and my skin started to tingle. This was good stuff. And I wanted more; more comics in general, but especially more of his stuff. I enjoy his work, and I enjoy the Glorious Bastard: I'm biased, and I make no secret about it.

But enough of my reminiscing. On to the review, as unbiased as I can make it.

Desolation Jones is the titular Glorious Bastard, a former MI6 agent and the only survivor of the mysterious "Desolation Test" who now lives in Los Angeles, which is secretly a prison for ex-spooks. Jones works as a private detective, solving mysteries for members of the community of retired spies. If the premise alone isn't enough to peak your interest, then I don't know what to say to you. Perhaps an evening of therapy involving spy movies and the drug of your choice would prime you for this book. Even if it doesn't, it sounds like a good night to me.

The first issue does pretty much everything right: in thirty-two pages, you're introduced to a half-dozen characters, told about the theft of some valuable property - or is it a kidnapping? or both? - and thrown head-first into the bizarre world Jones inhabits. It's got a sampling of everything I've come to expect from Ellis: reflections on modern philosophy, violence, unique and interesting characters, and the kind of dialogue that the man has a virtual trademark on. Example: "Hitler porn, you bastard. It's going to be a nightmare." It's smart writing, folks, and it pushes you along at a frenetic pace at times.

The art, by J.H. Williams III is outstanding. It's not what I'm used to seeing from him (Promethea, anyone? Seven Soldiers, perhaps?), but Desolation Jones is not the kind of book that lends itself well to intricate detail and full-page splashes. The art is more subdued, more fragile, and he gives each character a distinct look. His panel composition sets the perfect tone and pace for each scene - especially memorable is when he draws out a single action over a two-page spread, emphasizing the intensity of the moment. I enjoy the art just as much as I enjoyed the writing, which was a pleasant surprise.

Desolation Jones #1 is a solid first issue, and I recommend it to people who like spy stories, bizarre situations, or rooting for a smartass. Plus, it's bimonthly, so it's not a huge strain on your wallet. At least, that's what I'm telling myself.

Movie: God of Gamblers, The Return (1994)

2005-05-15T03:12:00.000-06:00

Reposted from Worst Ninja Ever (April 19, 2005):

Just finished watching "God of Gamblers: The Return," the 1994 sequel of the classic Hong Kong gambling fantadramedy starring Chow Yun-Fat. The film features the return of Chow's "Ko Chun, the God of Gamblers" character and is set four years after the original "God of Gamblers." Here, Ko Chun has retired to Paris where he and his wife are expecting a son. Ko's idyllic life in self-imposed retirement is shattered when Chan Kam-Shing, Ko's final opponent in the original film, brings a new player to help him get revenge on Ko.

This new player is none other than Chao Siu Chi, the Taiwanese Devil of Gamblers, and he doesn't mess around. Within the first few minutes of the movie, Chao double-crosses Chan Kam-Shing when the two gamblers and their entourage invade Ko's mansion. When Ko returns with his faithful bodyguard Lung Wu, our heroes fight their way up to Ko's wife, who has had her unborn child mercilessly ripped from her womb by Chao. Ko makes a deathbed promise to his wife that he will neither gamble nor identify himself to be the God of Gamblers for one year. Of particular note during the firefight is a shot where Ko, with guns in hand, leaps to the side. Lung Wu kicks a couple of clips directly into the guns while Ko is in the air! Neat!

Unable to exact his revenge, Ko travels. 11 months later, he befriends Hoi On, a Taiwanese syndicate member who, unbeknownst to Ko, has ties to Chao Siu Chi (hey, they have to get these plots rolling somehow) through the Wung Tu Group. Due to some strife within the group Hoi dies, but not before making Ko promise to take Hoi's son home.

Along the way, Ko and little Hoi Yuen (Miu Tse) are captured by Chinese police captain Kok Ching-Chung. Ko and the child escape police custody and hole up in a hotel run by a man and his niece and nephew. The niece and nephew, nicknamed "Little Guitar" and "Little Trumpet," respectively, attempt to con Ko and Hoi Yuen but end up aiding and abetting the two fugitives when Captain Kok and the police arrive. Little Guitar, whose real name is Siu Yiu-Yiu, has a girlish crush on the God of Gamblers but doesn't believe a girl like her would ever be lucky enough to meet her favourite celebrity. She does, however, think her new traveling companion looks a bit like her idol when viewed from behind.

The entire group ends up in Taiwan a couple of days early. Minor hijinks ensue; Captain Kok loosens up, being promoted from caricature to sidekick/comedy relief; Siu Yiu-Yiu and Hoi Yuen manage to get themselves kidnapped by Chao's men; and Little Trumpet gets to play God of Gamblers to divert suspicion from Ko and to woo a pretty girl.

This all culminates in the final showdown between the God of Gamblers and the Devil of Gamblers. Two billion dollars, a hijacked US$16 billion children's fund, body parts and very lives of two of the greatest gamblers in the east rest on the table between the gambling duelists.

I found this film to be much more enjoyable than its predecessor. The story was much tighter and tension was higher, but the line between fantasy, comedy and drama is still very vague and transitory. I grew up with these kinds of films, so I didn't find it unusual that a dramatic scene can quickly take a slapstick turn, or a fantasy action sequence turns to comedy then drama, all within a few lines. The character of Ko Chun doesn't get much more development in this film, since it's assumed that the "God of Gamblers" is enough of a character for an audience to grasp. The supporting characters are there to give Ko Chun something to react to, and they are separated into two groups.

The first group is Ko's traveling companions, who are all colourful, dynamic and generally sunshine and lollipops. They are there to elicit sympathy when they're attacked, cheered when they fight, and give the stone cold Ko someone to empathize with. They are also there to provide the comedy. The other group is comprised of the big players: ruthless gamblers and heartless killers. They are there to do the dirty work and provide the dramatic tension. Except for Ko and maybe Hoi Yuen, neither of the two groups ever tread on each other's territory. Never do we see Siu Yiu-Yiu competently kick ass, or Lung Wu slip on a banana peel and fall into the bosom of a large woman. Hilarity never ensues when Chan Kam-Shing's around, and Captain Kok is never taken seriously enough to be considered a threat.

But that's par for the course. Archetypes, outrageously short shooting schedules and overdubbing are Hong Kong movie staples. This film isn't Oscar material, but it's got a little something for everyone. I would highly recommend this film as a stand-alone viewing experience, or in conjunction with its predecessor. Heck, I'd even recommend it as an introduction to the subgenre of fantasy gambling films, where martial arts and gambling combine for high stakes action and unreal gambling duels.

This film is not to be confused with Stephen Chow's similar sounding "Du sheng/All for the Winner" or "Dou hap/God of Gamblers II," which is sequel to both "God of Gamblers" (Andy Lau's "Dagger Chan" character co-stars) and "All for the Winner" (Stephen Chow's "Saint of Gamblers" character co-stars). Weird. The closest that North American films come to that would probably be the first few Quentin Tarantino films, all of which are complete-in-themselves films but are set in the same universe.

Movie: The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (2005)

2005-05-04T17:19:00.000-06:00

Crossposted from Worst Ninja Ever.

Okay, so "later" turned out to be "the next day." But here it is, whether you like it or not: a Ninja's "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" review. Be forewarned, it's full of nostalgia and references to the original 1981 television series, so if you haven't seen that, you may be a bit confuzzled.

I went into "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" (HGttG) with high hopes and some trepidation, based on my experiences with the television series, books and the pre-release trailers. The film itself is a mostly faithful large-scale reproduction of the original television series, even down to the characters' dialogue, which only added to my enjoyment of the film. Great special effects shots and an almost humble cinematography style, feeling as though one was treading on hallowed media ground, rounded off the film experience nicely. From the prologue musical number by the dolphins of the world to the familiar "Hitchhiker's" theme music to the completion of the Earth (Mk. II), I knew I was in for quite the experience.

Certain differences between the television series and the film were excusable--indeed, they were even expected, based on the different media and audiences involved. A television series could afford to draw things out, while a film could not. A film can put some scales into proper perspective, like the sheer magnitude of the Vogon constructor fleet, while a television series hasn't the budget to do. The difference in scale didn't bother me at all, and in fact, I would have been disappointed if all I got out of the movie was a duplicate of the television series I loved so much.

The changes in the storyline bothered me a bit, since they didn't appear in the book. The entire capture of Trillian and her subsequent rescue on Vogsphere, while action-packed and fodder for a number of sight gags and bureaucracy humour, seemed unnecessary and a little contrived to further develop the budding romance between Arthur and Trillian. I didn't mind the film's focus on that relationship, as Trillian was a ditzy, all too cheerful and somewhat undeveloped character in the television series, not to mention the actress who portrayed her in the film--Zooey Deschanel--is rather cute. I merely felt that the relationship could have been developed without straying that far from the source material. Easy to say when I'm so far removed from the creative process, I know, but that's how I feel.

This leads me to the casting of the film. No problems here, save one, and it's a biggie. Zaphod Beeblebrox, played by Sam Rockwell, was so far removed from my image of the character--influenced, no doubt, by the television version's understated conceit and arrogance--that I found him to be obnoxious, random and dislikable. The film version wasn't hip or cool, nor did he fit what I would consider to be a "hoopy frood." Heck, his look didn't even appear able to win "Worst Dressed Sentient Being in the Universe" seven years running.

I really enjoyed the byplay between Martin Freeman's Arthur Dent and Mos Def's Ford Prefect. While different from their television counterparts, they really played up Ford's alien-ness and Arthur's reluctant acceptance of the strange goings-on around him. Those two characters form, in my opinion, the core of the "Hitchhiker's" story, and working the radio, television and film versions around that interaction was and is the best possible thing their respective creator could have done to bring the books to life. Simon Jones, television's Arthur Dent, had a cameo in the film as the recorded message of the planet Magrathea.

Marvin the Paranoid Android was another greatly enjoyable change. Cut from wholly dirrerent cloth than his television counterpart, the film's Marvin is a short, sleek robot just as suited to the minimalistic sleekness of the film's Heart of Gold spacecraft as the television's Marvin is to his own Heart of Gold. Played by the inimitable Warwick Davis, best known for his roles as the Leprechaun in all six movies of that franchise and Wicket the Ewok in "Return of the Jedi"--and, more recently, as Professor Flitwick in the "Harry Potter" films--Marvin provided much of the comedy relief in the film. Voice work by Alan Rickman, known lately as Severus Snape from the "Harry Potter" films, truly made the film Marvin a great casting choice all around.

Despite his creation by Douglas Adams specifically for the film, John Malkovich's Humma Kavula played a too-brief foil to Zaphod Beeblebrox. His multiple spider legs and calm and collected demeanor were a perfect foil to the out of control, manic Zaphod. Not only did he not get a lot of screen time, his little subplot that brought the Heart of Gold to Magrathea was never resolved at all. I would have liked to see more of his character.

The other notable casting choices were Stephen Fry as the voice of the Guide, and Bill Nighy's portrayal of Slartibartfast. Fry was a perfect choice and greatly resembled the television series' Peter Jones. Nighy played a younger, if no less awkward Slartibartfast than Richard Vernon. Both are wonderful in their respective roles, and seem obvious nods to their television counterparts. Also, be on the lookout for cameos by Dame Helen Mirren as the voice of the supercomputer, Deep Thought, and an uncredited Jason Schwartzman as Zaphod's personal braincare specialist, Gag Halfrunt.

All in all, the film version of "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" was enjoyable, but due to the somewhat expositionary material provided by the Guide itself, I felt that it would have been better served as a brand new television series, and an English one, at that. The film version lacked the subtlety of some of the film's humour, with more of that subtlety lost due to the film's primarily North American target audience. It should be seen if one is at all a fan of the series of books, as it is a worthwhile adaptation, but if one is a purist, one should be prepared to be let down a few times. Even if one is not a fan, one should see it for its wacky humour, a decent romance between the hapless protagonist and the girl he thought lost forever, and the beautifully funny lines from Marvin the Paranoid Android.

Movie: The Greatest Love Story Ever Told

2005-04-30T19:53:00.000-06:00

Arlen Konopaki and Mike Robertson's debut film The Greatest Love Story Ever Told is pretty similar to a host of Edmonton's recent slew of low-budget comedy flicks; subversively funny, comfortable on the eyes, and giggling nervously due to the stress. It's a charming love story between Rutiger, a doctor with enough baggage to go around, and Merv, the long-suffering woman who steals his heart. It's a romantic comedy caught in an ironic trap, more concerned with the laughs than with the romance, but it's a forgivable omission when the humour itself is so engaging. Instead, the film runs into problems running as a two-hour comedy.

TGLSET starts off on a giddy, full-blown cynical note: taking its cue from The Princess Bride, a kindly older man sits at the foot of a sick kid's bed to read him a romantic fairytale. Unlike Princess Bride, however, the man is not related, not invited, chloroforms the kid and knocks the mother down beating his hasty retreat. It's a damn funny scene; it's also a pretty appropriate blueprint for every scene that follows it. Konopaki and Robertson set up a situation, give it a comic twist, do something even more shocking, and then run screaming from the joke. It gets results short-term, but this is a two-hour movie we're dealing with. You need to space out whip-crack jokes with subtler approaches, or it becomes a bit too much over the course of the evening.

Or maybe it's a sign of the times that Family Guy is now old enough to be considered an artistic influence. TGLSET's humour relies on quick set-ups and throw-away flashbacks, letting the script ultimately dictate the storyboard and final edit, and this handicaps the movie's ability to tell the story as well as it could. When as much of the movie (and its humour) relies on the audience knowing when Rutiger and Merv are meeting, together, broken up or on the mend, the sudden (and sometimes random) chapter-flipping is downright confusing.

As the childish and mercurial Rutiger, Konopaki shines; he combines likeability and bug-eyed craziness in a way that works, and the movie keeps him busy flaunting his comic chops. Tia Chambers plays Merv as a sweet, almost-inflappable pixie. Unfortunately, it's very much the boys' movie--other than being everyone's object of affection, Chambers has very little to do, an unfortunate inequality that hinders the couples chemistry. If Margaret Dumont were still alive, she would have done quite fine here, but you're not supposed to like Margaret Dumont. Beyond that, tons of local funnymen and friends fill out the cast in a blink-and-you'll-miss-them parade, and most do well with what they're given. I especially loved Marc Shulte's supporting role as the self-centered and cruel best friend Zander.

The biggest laughs of the night came from a fantasy sequence shot entirely in silent movie style; it was corny as hell, but they also kept it simple and lavished more care on their jokes. And that should hopefully prove to be informative for Konopaki and Robertson: ultimately, it's a movie that's about as strong as the lessons they've learned while shooting the movie.

The Greatest Love Story Ever Told is strong for a debut movie. I want to see more, and the packed house it played to was undoubtedly into it. So see the film--and support a local production--but if you check your head at the door, you'll probably enoy it better.

The Greatest Love Story Ever Told runs at the Princess Theatre (10337 - 82 Avenue) through May 5th.

(And incidentally, the soundtrack is provided by the filmmaker's band, The Corduroys, and kicks your ass. It's a little cart-before-the-horse, but they really did well with the music.)

Web: Nanaca Crash!!

2005-04-25T00:51:00.000-06:00

If you haven't seen this yet, you might want to check it out.

It's pretty much what you want a Flash game to deliver: it's simple enough to load, easy enough to figure out (which you'll have to, as the instructions are delivered unmercifully in Japanese), and addictive enough to burn up a half hour you were probably intending on spending on something else. There's strategy involved and stuff you can pick up on, but enough dumb luck to make even a beginner kick ass.

For what it's worth, my top score's something like 1000 m, but that's small potatoes. It's a scary planet.

Also: I have a theory that this game is much more enjoyable when you've freshly dumped someone or have been freshly dumped. Couldn't tell you in either event.

Event: Pop Culture Fair

2005-04-20T22:39:00.000-06:00

Not that anyone here from the EGS is involved with this event, but the Edmonton Pop Culture Fair is coming up this Sunday, April 24. It's going to be held at the Edmonton Aviation Heritage Centre, 11410 Kingsway Ave., from 10:00 am to 4:00 pm. Admission is $4. You can get more info here.

Why am I mentioning it? Well, I've been to the past two fairs, and let me tell you something: if you're even remotely interested in standing in an airplane hangar full of collectables - comics, cds, records, photos, toys, cards, and the like - and over 50% of Edmonton's geek community, then you should go, even for half an hour. Even my girlfriend enjoys herself there, and the geekiest thing she enjoys is the odd episode of Star Trek.

Television: Dr. Who

2005-04-19T21:46:00.000-06:00

I have a confession. I have never seen an episode of the original Dr. Who series. I know, I know, I'm a bad geek, but I had only broadcast television when I was growing up: no cable, no PBS - or whatever channel it was on - so no Dr. Who for the little Doc. So when I heard that the BBC was continuing the series, I was of two minds about it. I was interested and excited to see it, but I was also worried that, without knowing anything about the original series, the relaunch would be incomprehensible.

Fortunately, that was not the case. The new Dr. Who is thoroughly enjoyable and stands up well on its own merits: knowledge of previous continuity is not a pre-requisite (although I would imagine that it would enhance the viewer's enjoyment). I've only seen the first three episodes, and I'm solidly hooked. The talent of the actors that play The Doctor (Christopher Eccleston) and his companion Rose Tyler (Billie Piper) are a huge reason: not only are they skilled individuals, but their chemistry is fantastic:

The Doctor: Tell you what... with a little bit of jiggery pokery...
Rose: Is that a technical term, "jiggery pokery"?
The Doctor: Yeah, I came first in jiggery pokery, what about you?
Rose: Nah, I failed hullabaloo.

I'm very disappointed that Eccleston is leaving the show before the end of the first season: he's got great charisma and he delivers a strong performance without being self-aware. He steps into the iconic role with skill and grace, and I'll just have to hope that his replacement can maintain the high standard he set.

I like everything about the show; the stories, the special effects, the scripts: nothing bad to say about any of them. I don't want to give synopses of the episodes I've seen - if you haven't seen them, I'm sure you can get a hold of them somehow, and if I tried to summarize the shows, I wouldn't be doing them justice. Essentially, what I'm trying to get across is that Dr. Who is a very good show, and if you like science fiction, tales of adventure, or the medium of television, you should be watching it.

Download: Bill Janovitz and Crown Victoria

2005-04-18T23:50:00.000-06:00

Background

I remember when Napster started; I also remember when they shut its ass down. MP3s were controversial beasts back then, and were surely going to destroy the music industry as we know it. The RIAA believed it. Lance Bass believed it. They argued it only exists to distribute pirated music for no cost and pulled its plug. The influence on artists: negligable. Then they were bought up by Bertlesmann, the conglomerate behind Sony BMG, and made into a pay service.

Yeah, there were new FTP programs since those innocent days: you could get KISS on Kazaa, Moby on Morpheus, or Los Lobos on Limewire (a truly excellent program, by the way, with no spyware) . . . but can you make the argument that they help the artists? If you're like me, you'd say no, but if you're like me, then you're also a smug, greedy bastard and will do it anyways.

(Bear with me, this is going somewhere.)

So what if you want to download free music on a clear conscience?

There used to be a fascinating site once called MP3.com. I say "fascinating" because they would feature tracks posted by new, unproven artists, broken down by category and marketed as adventurous new sounds. I've bought albums based off of downloads off of this site; the gamble pays off for these acts. However, I also say "used to be" because they were bought up by Bertlesmann, the conglomerate behind Sony BMG, and made into a pay service.

So now the site to visit is Download.com, which operates like the old-school MP3.com with artists arranged by genre or location. It's a massive spawl of musicians and styles, and of course, some are good, some are bad, but you've got to take the time to fish. At least before they're bought up by Bertlesmann, the conglomerate behind Sony BMG, and made into a pay service.

And so . . .

I've honestly never come across Bill Janovitz before, and now I'm wishing I had much sooner so to track his earlier material down. He's been playing for over fifteen years, has earned indie praise during all this time, and even has a book on the Stones coming out. The Download.com selection is just a couple of cuts from his one of two bands (Buffalo Tom being the other one.)

The first song, Almost Beating, is good. Nothing incredibly fancy, mind you, just solid ensemble playing, folksy poetry lyrics and a solid-but-smokey voice. If you grew up listening to Tom Cochrane, you've heard this before, and it's something I'd enjoy best, say, car-tripping. It's that kind of song.

One, Two, Three on the other hand . . . sweet Jesus. I can not get this song out of my head for trying. From the sweet, subdued drumming that leads in to all the instrumentals kicking in, to the bittersweet love story in the lyrics ("We’re just the notches on the Fahrenheit thermometer, the third degree / The first, the second child, the third was me") . . . this is exactly the kind of song that you can hear cold and then want to hear more. It's haunting, then catchy, then honest, then passionate. Janovitz runs the entire gamut through this song and doesn't pander while doing it. It sounds like something Elvis Costello would do if he wasn't obsessed with classical composition . . . wait, no, he did try it.

Do yourself a favour and try one or both of the tracks . . . it's worth your time. If you disagree with me, delete them, but you still gave them a chance.

As for me, I'm itching to buy some of Janovitz' discs . . . all because of some free MP3s. Now why is this concept so hard to understand, Lance Bass?

Comic: Bone

2005-04-18T15:33:00.000-06:00

I've been reading Jeff Smith's Bone since 1995, when the mother of my friend Perry gave me the first few issues to read.

From the first page of the first issue, I was enraptured. It was like the old Carl Barks "Uncle Scrooge" stories, featuring these three cousins who were run out of their hometown: the megalomaniacal Phoney Bone (who acted like a jerky Uncle Scrooge); Smiley Bone, the cousin who'd go along with Phoney on everything (if only for being part of something fun); and Fone Bone, the innocent one that you can't help but empathise with.

They find themselves in this almost Bronze Age fantasy valley, complete with talking bugs, dragons and rat creatures. So begins a story with the scope of The Lord of the Rings, and a buttload of humour to boot.

Hidden princesses, a dimension called The Dreaming, Moby Dick. This story has everything, and it can be read by youngsters and old people alike.

Dev's dad actually started reading Bone because he brought it into the school he teaches at. Scholastic Books is republishing the trades in colour for younger readers. It's just one of the most innocent, thrilling, funny books I've read, period.

I just picked up the last trade over the weekend. And while reading it, I started to cry. True, it was in part because a major character I've known for ten years was killed, but it was also because I knew this was the end. The Bones couldn't stay in the valley, because they were from a different place. And they would go home. And it would be the biggest decision Fone Bone would ever have to make.

Seriously, if you haven't read any Bone books, I'd urge you to pick them up. Or, hell, I'll lend them to you. Because, seriously, this series is what comics is all about. It's like what Cerebus would be to me if it stayed in the whole Church and State mode for all of its three hundred issues.

The Great Cow Race alone is worth the price of reading ten volumes.

Geeks! Geeks!

2005-04-18T15:19:00.000-06:00

Hi. Welcome to the Edmonton Geek Society (although the name might change soon), the combined blog of some Edmonton friends.

Let's introduce you to the players (did we want to do this with full names or what, here?):

I'm Kyle Jago, creator of Biting the Hand that Reads Me. Along with me are Devin R. Bruce (author of Doctor Teeth's Electric Mayhem), Stan Woo (author of WorstNinjaEver, for the sake of brevity), and D!. (Edited. -KJ)

Dev wanted to see me write more, since my blog wasn't really being updated as much as he (or I) would like. He and Stan came up with the idea of this blog, which would focus on our more geeky obsessions.

I was worried that this might kill Biting the Hand, but I'm willing to give it a try.

So, on with my first rant about a particular comic...